From the harshest sorrows......

{{{{{{Kat}}}}}} just read your post here and even though I COULD have just replied to you personally, I feel it appropriate to answer in this forum. As I read your words, I want to cry. You knew this of course....

This year has seen many sorrows for so many families. Like you, some days I just want it to STOP. You know, those days when you just want to pull the covers over your head and say "I'm not here".....and then I remind myself that for some, pulling up the covers is an impossible luxury, and I throw those covers back, and thank God for my many blessings.

But as I read your words, I was reminded of something very basic, and something that for me has been so very profound. Like you, and everyone else, I have had many dark nights of the soul. No, thank God, I have not lost a child by ANY means -

But, back to my point (you do head this blog by saying 'ramblings' and I wouldnt want to disappoint ya girl :) ) As you have found, I also have found. Within those dark nights of the soul, I have been given so many blessings. From those days of agony, I have seen such beauty, been given so many amazing gifts. Along the path, as I have wallowed in the valleys of despair ( a great U2 quote by the way), I have come to know such wonderful travelling companions, had my eyes and my heart opened to so much love, some days I feel as if I could burst with all the revelations that have been given to me.

One thing I have come to know for sure; and this knowing brings me great solace, great comfort. It is in those times when we are drowning in sorrow that God is working hardest on our behalf. I so often see God's Hand at work now, I wonder how I could have been so blind all those years. I know, very well, there are NO words of comfort for a grieving parent, but I also have been blessed to be bathed in the grace with which every grieving parent takes one faltering step at a time. I absolutely believe we are ALL here to help one another. I also KNOW that there are never ever any coincidental meetings. By your knowing Mike's family, you have seen so many blessings. And I know that every step of your journey has given you great opportunity. And just like a set of stepping stones across a river or a brook, so one leads to another, to another and to another. None of us know where the journey may take us. But, if our hearts are open, we are given the most wondrous blessings. I was led to this moment, by so many not so coincidental stepping stones, as were you. You, and all I know, are major blessings in my life. So yes, August may be the cruellest of months but is also the most wonder-filled of any month. (And July is that month for me and here we are - done with July again, and every July as I get through the pains remembered, I find more blessings to ease those pains.) I wish you, THIS August, every day, a heart that feels those wonders.

And I marvel that within this HUGE universe, this crazy BritBrat (who chose Canada) is intricately connected with you, and you, and you. We are all ONE. How amazing is that? Truly, you and I are blessed by all we have seen and know, my friend......Love you {{{{{{Kat}}}}}}}}} *swooooooooooosh*